Anal sex
Penetration of the anus or bum hole, sometimes called “buggery” or “sodomy”. This is a high risk activity in terms of catching an STI such as HIV or syphilis. Some men and women get really turned on by the thought and sensations of anal stimulation, but many people are just as turned off and don’t like the idea. Anal sex can be very uncomfortable unless you use lots of water based lubricant and go slowly.

Asexual
Asexual is a where a person does not experience sexual attraction or does not have interest in or desire for sex. Asexuality is not the same as celibacy, which is the deliberately avoiding sexual activity.

Aids
Stands for ‘Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome’, a term used for someone with HIV whose immune system can no longer cope and develops a further illness. Usually now referred to as ‘late stage’ or ‘advanced’ HIV infection (see HIV below for more info).

Abortion
Sometimes called a ‘termination’, abortion means ending a pregnancy. Abortion is legal in the UK up to 24 weeks of pregnancy although most abortions (90 per cent) are carried out before 13 weeks.  There are different methods of abortion and the method used will depend on how far along you are in your pregnancy. Most abortion services will be able to offer a choice of methods.

Abstinence
Abstinence is the practice of refraining from some or all aspects of sexual activity for medical, psychological, legal, social or religious reasons.

 

B is for…

Blow Job (fellatio in the dictionary)
Oral sex. Stimulating a man’s penis with your mouth and tongue. Sometimes known as “giving head” or “going down on someone”. Nothing to do with blowing at all! Flavoured condoms should be worn during oral sex to reduce the likelihood of catching infections, such as Herpes, Gonorrhoea and Syphilis which can live in the mouth and throat. This is a low risk activity as long as you use a condom – that’s right, you do still need one!

Bisexual
Someone who is attracted to both women and men.

 

C is for…

Chlamydia
A very common sexually transmitted infection (STI) caught by men and women. Many people don’t get symptoms but those that do can experience irregular bleeding, discharge and pain when urinating. In women, if Chlamydia goes undetected for a long time it can cause Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID) which can lead to pelvic pain, blocked fallopian tubes and infertility.

Clitoris
Also known as the ‘clit’, this is a very small sensitive area at the top of the vagina. Most women don’t orgasm during penetrative sex and require clitoral stimulation to ‘come’ or ‘climax’.

Condom
Male and female condoms are ‘barrier methods’ of contraception and are also the only form of contraception to protect against STIs. Male condoms fit over a man’s erect penis and are usually made of very thin latex. If used correctly male condoms are up to 98 per cent effective in preventing pregnancy.

Condoms come in all different shapes, sizes and flavours – so no need to stick to “extra safe”! Always check that the condom is in date and that it has the Kite mark or the European CE mark as this means it has been safety tested. Never use novelty condoms, they are not safe (although you can get glow in the dark ones from Sexual Health services if you’re after something different!).

Coil
An old fashioned term for a type of female contraception. See IUD.

Contraception
A term for all methods of preventing pregnancy.

Cum / Come
Slang term for Semen or sexual fluids. The fluid released at the moment of orgasm. Men ejaculate come or semen which contains thousands of Sperm. Some women can also ejaculate. The term ‘pre-cum’ refers to the fluid released from a man’s penis during sex, which can also contain sperm.

 

D is for…

Depo
Depo-Provera is a contraceptive injection which protects you for 12 weeks at a time. It works by stopping your ovaries releasing an egg each month, thickening the mucus from your Cervix and making the lining of the womb thinner so it is less likely to accept a fertilised egg.

Dental Dam
A barrier method of protection from STIs. A thin latex sheet used for protection when giving oral sex to the vagina or anus

Discharge
It’s normal for all women to get vaginal discharge throughout the month. The amount that comes out can vary, depending on where you’re at in your menstrual cycle. Sometimes discharge looks thick and white, and other times (when you’re releasing an egg, around ovulation) it can be stringy and clear or have a yellowish look to it.

The point of discharge is to keep the vagina moist, clean and healthy. It cleans the vagina by getting rid of dead cells and bacteria.

Delay
To ‘delay’ is to wait until you are fully ready to have sex of any kind – see our section on ‘sex for the 1st time’ for more info. Waiting to have sex until you’re ready and taking precautions is low risk for STIs and a really good way of avoiding feelings of regret.

 

E is for…

Erection
A man’s penis gets bigger and hard when he is sexually excited – this is called an erection. Also known as a ‘hard on’, a ‘stiffy’, a ‘boner’ or ‘getting wood’… we’re sure you have a few more terms for it too, lads.

Ejaculation
Men ejaculate semen from the urethra, or tip of the penis, when they orgasm. Semen contains thousands of Sperm. Some women can also ejaculate sexual fluids at orgasm.

Emergency Contraception
The emergency contraceptive pill. Often referred to as the Morning After Pill it can actually be used for up to 3 days (72 hours) after sex. It is not an abortion pill. It can stop an egg being released (ovulation), delay ovulation or stop a fertilised egg from settling in the Uterus (implanting).

 

F is for…

Foreplay
Foreplay is a set of intimate psychological and physical acts between two or more people, meant to build up sexual arousal. Foreplay takes place in preparation for sexual intercourse or another act (oral sex/fingering) meant to bring about mutual sexual gratification or orgasm. Foreplay is low risk (and fun!).

Flirting
A way of showing people you are sexually interested in them – or of making yourself sexually attractive without necessarily meaning to take things any further. Again, flirting is low risk and a good laugh.

Foreskin
A thin layer of skin covering the tip or the penis or ‘helmet’. The tip of the penis is very sensitive so the foreskin helps to protect it. The foreskin normally rolls back naturally when a man has an erection. Some men and young men have their foreskin removed when they are young for cultural, religious or medical reasons if their foreskin is too tight and they can’t roll it back.

Fuck
Slang term or sexual swear word meaning to have sexual intercourse. A high risk activity if done without protection from STIs and pregnancy. See the contraception section for advice on staying safe!

 

G is for…

G-spot
A very sexually sensitive area. People still argue over whether the G-Spot really exists but for women it is said to be inside the vagina on the front wall. For men, it is said to be the prostate gland, which is in the anus.

Gay
Being gay is being attracted to someone of the same sex. If someone is bullied or victimised for being gay this is called “homophobia”.

Gonorrhoea
A very common sexually transmitted infection (STI). Not everyone who has Gonorrhoea will get symptoms but those that do might get a yellow or green discharge from the penis or vagina and pain when urinating.  Luckily, when discovered early, Gonorrhoea is easily treated, often with a single dose of antibiotics.

Genital Warts Genital
Warts is the most common viral sexually transmitted infection (STI). The warts are caused by the human papilloma virus, or HPV, which can be passed on during sexual contact.

Not everyone who has the virus will get warts. They can appear anywhere from three weeks to months or even years after coming into contact with the virus. The warts can look like small, fleshy lumps or growths on or around the genitals or anus.

Genital Herpes
Genital Herpes is a sexually transmitted infection (STI) it is caused by the virus Herpes simplex or HSV. There are two types, HSV I and HSV II. Both types can cause painful sores or scabs on and around the genitals and anus. Genital herpes is highly infectious and is most likely to be passed on just before, during or straight after an outbreak.

Going down
Oral sex. Stimulating a woman’s clitoris, vulva and vagina with your mouth and tongue. Also called ‘Cunnilingus’ in the dictionary, in case you wondered!

 

H is for…

Herpes
See Genital herpes.

HIV
HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus. If someone becomes infected with HIV they are said to be HIV positive and the virus will stay in their body for the rest of their life. There is no cure or vaccine available at the moment but regular drug treatments mean that people can now live much longer.

Hard-on
A slang term for an erection. Also known as a ‘stiffy’, a ‘boner’ or ‘getting wood’.

Heterosexual
The term for someone who is attracted to people of the opposite sex, also known as being “straight”.

Homosexual
Someone who is attracted to people of the same sex (men fancy men and women fancy women). This term is less popular now, with many people preferring to use the word gay or lesbian.

 

I is for…

Intercourse
A joining of the sexual organs two people. In heterosexual (straight)relationships the erect penis of the male is inserted into the vagina of the female, usually with the ejaculation of semen into the vagina. A high risk activity without protection.

Sexual intercourse typically plays a powerful role in human bonding, often being used solely for pleasure and leading to stronger emotional bonds.

Implant
The contraceptive implant is a small flexible rod which is placed under the skin in your upper arm where it releases the hormone progesterone. Known as “Nexplanon” in the UK it works for 3 years and is over 99 per cent effective. This means that less than one woman in 1,000 will get pregnant over three years.

IUD
An IUD is a small plastic and copper contraceptive device that is put into your womb by a specially trained doctor or nurse. The IUD can stay in for 5-10 years.

Newer IUDs are more than 99 per cent effective. This means less than one woman in 100 women will get pregnant in a year.

 

J is for…

Jonnies
Slang term for condoms. Condoms are a barrier method of contraception. They fit over a man’s erect penis and are usually made of very thin latex. If used correctly they are up to 98 per cent effective. Also known as “Jimmies” and “rubbers”.

 

K is for…

Karma Sutra
Arguably the world’s most famous sex manual – and certainly the oldest. It is thought to have been compiled in India by a Hindu wise man some time between the 3rd and 5th centuries BC and was first published in English in 1883 – thanks to Sir Richard Burton, who translated several exotic works, such as The Perfumed Garden, into English.

Knob
Slang word for penis.

Knockers
Slang term for female breasts.

 

L is for…

Love
Love is to have a tender, passionate affection for another person. Love, affection, devotion all means a deep and enduring emotional regard, usually for another person.

Lesbian
A girl or woman attracted to other females.

Libido
See ‘sex-drive’.

Lube / Lubricant

A slippery liquid you can put on the penis, vagina, anus or fingers to reduce friction and increase pleasure during sex. Lubricant is free from ISIS services and family planning clinics.

You can also buy it from high street chemists, like Boots or Superdrug, and at some larger supermarkets (look near the condom section). Make sure you use a water based lubricant, like KY Jelly, as oil based lubricants can damage condoms.

Labia
The lips of the vagina. Girls have two sets of labia, inner and outer or ‘Minora’ and ‘Majora’. Also known by the slang word “flaps”.

 

M is for…

Masturbation
Stimulation of the genitals, usually with your hand. Masturbation is a great way of finding out more about your body and can lead to orgasm.

Boys and men usually masturbate by gripping the base of the penis and moving their hand up and down. Women usually masturbate by stimulating their clitoris with their fingers.

However, there is no right or wrong way to masturbate; whatever feels right to you is ok. There are lots of myths about masturbation, but it is not bad for you and you can do it as much, or as little, as you like.

Morning After Pill
See ‘emergency contraception’ above.

 

N is for…

Non-specific urethritis
Non-specific urethritis, or NSU causes pain, redness or swelling of the urethra (pee hole).

It is usually the result of vaginal, anal or oral sex with someone who has a sexually transmitted infection (STI). It’s called ‘non specific’ because further testing for a variety of infections may be necessary. Infections, such as Chlamydia, herpes and trichomonas vaginalis, as well as other bacterial infections can cause urethritis.

It’s difficult to diagnose NSU in women so the above information only applies to men.

 

O is for…

Orgasm
Also called ‘climaxing’ or ‘coming’. An orgasm is an intense sensation of sexual pleasure. Both men and women have orgasms, men usually ejaculate when they orgasm.

Oral sex
Oral sex is stimulating your partner’s genitals with your mouth or tongue. Some couples have mutual oral sex in the ’69′ position but, ultimately, there is no right or wrong way to give oral sex because different people like different things. Low risk, as long as you use a condom.

 

P is for…

Porn
Pornography (or porn) is the depiction of explicit sexual scenes, usually through films and pictures for the viewers own sexual excitement. Many people enjoy pornography and many people don’t. It’s a personal choice. Can often give misleading ideas on how people have sex – remember, it’s not all like it is in the movies…

Penis
The male genital organ. Carrying the duct for the transfer of sperm. It consists largely of erectile tissue and serves also for passing urine.

Pre Cum
Also known as pre-come or pre-ejaculate. When a man gets an erection his penis releases a tiny amount of clear fluid called pre-cum. This liquid can contain thousands off sperm and can get a girl pregnant even if you don’t ejaculate.

 

Q is for…

Quickie
A brief or spontaneous episode of sexual activity!

 

R is for…

Rimming
Stimulation of the anus or bum hole with the tongue. The anus has lots of nerve endings and is very sensitive. High risk for STIs.

Rape
Rape is an act of sexual violence and domination and is defined as when someone forces you to have any kind of sex – vaginal, anal or oral – without your consent. Rape is a criminal offence.

 

S is for…

Sex Drive
A physiological need for sexual activity, creating sexual desire.

Sixty Nine (69)
Refers to a sexual position in which both partners give one another oral sex at the same time. Her on top is the most common position (because women tend to be lighter than men). He lies on his back. She is on all fours, with her bum in the air, immediately over his face; and her mouth over his penis.

Sperm (cum / come)
The liquid that comes out of man’s penis during ejaculation (‘coming’) which can make a woman pregnant. Sperm is carried in semen.

STI
Sexually transmitted infection / disease. Infections passed on during sexual activity which can cause long-term health problems. Most can be treated quite easily. To avoid getting a STI always wear a condom.

Syphilis
Syphilis is a sexually transmitted infection (STI). It develops in three stages and symptoms can include sores where the bacteria entered the body, usually the genitals and a non-itchy rash that can develop over the entire body.

Syphilis is easily treated with antibiotics but, if it left untreated after many years it can cause serious damage to the heart, brain, eyes and nervous system. In some cases, it can lead to death.

 

T is for…

TOP / Termination of pregnancy
See abortion.

Thrush
Thrush is a yeast infection. It’s not sexually transmitted but sex can sometimes make it worse. It is easily treated with pills or special creams available from the chemist.

Not everyone who has thrush will get symptoms but women might experience itching or redness around the vagina, unusual thick or smelly discharge, pain when urinating or during sex. Men might experience a burning or itching feeling under the foreskin, redness under the foreskin, a cottage cheese like discharge or a yeasty smell when pulling back their foreskin

 

U is for…

Unprotected sex
Sex without using a barrier method such as a condom or femidom. Some people think it refers to sex without using contraception but this is not true. If they are using another method of contraception, such as the pill, injection, implant or IUD, they are still protected against pregnancy (but not sexually transmitted infections STIs!).

 

V is for…

Vagina
The vagina has two sets of labia – the outer lips and the inner lips. The outer lips are covered in pubic hair, and they can be very fleshy. The inner lips are inside the outer labia and don’t have any pubic hair on them.

When a woman gets aroused her vagina swells with blood, and the outer labia can look quite swollen. This is perfectly normal, and it happens to all women. Some women have small inner lips, and you might not be able to see them easily. Some women have larger inner lips, and they can hang down outside the outer lips, so they’re always visible. Both sets of lips can be different lengths from each other.

Every woman is different and there is nothing abnormal about having large inner lips that hang down. Lots of women have this, and it’s perfectly normal.

Viagra
A pill prescribed for men who have trouble maintaining an erection. People without erection difficulties also use Viagra so they can keep an erection for large amounts of time. Some men report having erections that last for several hours. Also known as the “blue pill” and “Vitamin V”.

Vulva
A woman’s external genital organs or the opening of the vagina. People tend to say vagina more often than vulva. The vagina is a muscular tube which leads from the cervix to the vulva.

Virgin
Different people define “Virginity” in different ways and it varies by culture and religion. Generally, most people think of a virgin as someone who has never had sex before. Some people think vaginal sex is only what counts, but other people think of anal sex and oral sex as losing your virginity too. So it’s up to the individual to decide.

So if you have had vaginal sex with someone, then most people would say that you are no longer a virgin. If you haven’t had vaginal sex with someone, then most people would say you are a virgin. But there aren’t any checks possible to tell

 

W is for…

Wanking
Slang term meaning masturbating, also it can be used as an insult.

Wet dreams
Wet dreams are when men ejaculate (or come) or when a woman’s vagina lubricates in their sleep. It is more common when you’re a teenager but will still happen less regularly when you are older.

Withdrawal
The withdrawal method is when a man withdraws from a woman’s vagina before he ejaculates so that she does not get pregnant. High risk for STIs and pregnancy.

It is not a form of contraception and it is not safe if you do not want to get pregnant. This is because as soon as a man has an erection his penis will release a tiny amount of pre-cum or pre-ejaculate.

Pre-cum is often very difficult to see but it can contain thousands of sperm which means a girl can still get pregnant even if the man withdraws before he ejaculates or comes. There is never a safe time to have unprotected sex.

X is for…

X-rated
Can be a film, video, etc. that has received a rating of X. Because of sexually explicit or obscene content.

Y is for…

You
You have the right to choose with who and when to have sex. Nobody should or has the right to force you in to anything you do not feel comfortable with.

 

Z is for…

You tell us! – Any suggestions?